thirsty for generous grace

If I did not believe that I am, to some extent, responsible to help those who are not willing to help themselves, I would not work where I do. Almost every day, I am faced with any of a dozen variations on the same pattern: . Mary ran away from home because her mom called her a slut. Her mom didn't like the way she was dressed, her makeup and piercings, the fact that she skips school three times a week to smoke up with a few new friends, and the fact that money goes missing out of her purse even though Mary always denies taking it. The fights at home are mostly verbal, although it's not unheard of for either party to fly off the handle and slap or push the other. Mary says she hates her mom's boyfriend and won't go home unless he leaves. Mary's mom says that she's tired of the behaviours, and Mary is not welcome back home until she is willing to change. Mary's dad is out of the picture. Her mom left him six years ago because he tended to become violent when he was drunk, which was often. . John was kicked out of his house after a fight between he and his dad became violent. John says that he won't go home until his dad agrees to go to anger management. John is no longer attending school - he quit three months ago, saying that he hated school because of the bullying. He hangs out downtown with a bunch of guys he met at the shelter (he's been here for a few short stays after previous blow-outs at home). He's been picked up by RCMP a few times for mischief, theft, and has also gotten a few smoking tickets. More recently, he was arrested and charged with assault. One night he returns to the shelter high and staff address it with him. He says, "F*** you all. I'll just leave then." . I am challenged daily to choose to believe that change is possible when it doesn't appear probable. I am challenged to choose to change daily, continuing to grow and mature. If I want to see youth make changes in their lives, I must have influence - I must have a relationship with them. A relationship is only possible if I am respected by them. Respect is granted if I am trusted. And trust? Trust is only offered if I am a trustworthy person - a person of character with integrity. . I choose... ...to believe that change is possible. ...to change so I may inspire change. ...to remember that each one must also choose, and I cannot choose for them. ...to give grace generously out of my experience of grace. . We live in a world thirsty for generous grace. . *The names and stories of "Mary" and "John" are in no way intended to reflect that of any individual youth, and simply reflect some of the components common to the stories of many of the youth I cross paths with.